Let us say that you have “separated” and everything is going swimmingly. You have, informally, agreed any current issues. Why on earth would you want to rock the boat? What is the point in making a formal agreement?
I feel like a party-pooper when I pose these questions….
- Who is to say that whatever informal agreements that you have made will last?
- Even if they did, what would happen if you were to die prematurely?
- Where do kids fit in?
- What if you want a divorce?
- What about the future?
- It is expensive to see a lawyer but will it cost you more not to see a lawyer?
You are where you are and it is not easy. The current way out is for both parties to see separate lawyers. This is time consuming, emotionally draining and, with two lawyers involved, usually, expensive.
It is not that the lawyers cause this but the very step of seeing separate lawyers focuses on the conflicts where there may well be a great deal of common ground.
I have an idea whereby the parties could, with some legal guidance, set out their common ground in a draft separation agreement. This would leave only those areas where there is real disagreement to be dealt with by lawyers. That would save money and stress.
In certain cases you could end up with a whole agreement although, as a lawyer, I would feel uneasy about it not being checked over for the stuff the things you may have forgotten about or are yet to crop up.
It can be done but I need a little help.
In the comments box, below, please let me have your thoughts about but not limited to:-
- Would it help you?
- Have you been through this process? How would this have made it easier?
- What would make it easy?
- What would you want from such a system?
- What would it look like?
- What would it cost?
- Would you consider an agreement that was based upon legal principles that had not been checked, by lawyers, for your particular circumstances.
I shall be very grateful to all contributors and I look forward to the discussion.
Bruce de Wert